Gray skies are always a challenge with my chronic Vit D deficiency and my batteries were running low and patience wearing thin.
I always laugh to others that I am "solar powered" when they ask about the dark circles under my eyes that concealer never really conceals, and the slow cramped up movements on my stiff body from the inflammation that loves to visit during the dreary days.
"Once the sun pops out, I'll be just fine," I usually reassure...but this was the 4th day in a row without sun and I was at my breaking point.
The walls of our old farmhouse seemed to be closing in.
Living on only the bottom level of a 2 story home was fun at first. "It's like living in a cabin," I jokingly said to my hubby. If the Ingalls family on Little House could live in a small space with their large family, surely the two of us could make a go of single floor living for the next couple years while the upper levels gets renovated.
I fell in love with the farmhouse the minute I saw it.
The adorable wooden bridge, the gorgeous brick chimneys, the sprawling 12 acre partially forested farmland with outbuildings...THIS was the home we prayed for!
But 9 months in...the blessing we so joyfully gave thanks for, was quickly being forgotten and ungratefulness was starting to settle in.
Feeling overwhelmed and sorry for myself, I grumbled under my breath, but God spoke to my heart...
"It's not all it will someday be, but it's enough."
What God? What did you just whisper?
I let it sink in a little.
The first half of that statement was a reassurance but the second half washed over me and repeated itself once more...."it's enough."
And it is.
We have a roof over our heads, we have a comfortable bed to sleep in. We have a garden filled with nutrition and sustenance ripe for the picking. Crickets lull us to sleep each night, and peace and privacy surround us each day.
My health may be not be perfect, but I am able to wake each morning, I am able to work, I am able to spend time with family and friends, and I am able to worship.
And we have love. Love for one another as husband and wife, and the love of a Holy Father who always meets our needs.
Sometimes it's easy to let your heart wander to the "somedays" and "what ifs" and allow our minds to get bogged down with the "have nots" but I'm learning that those negative reactions cloud the truth of what really "IS." And in a way, discounts the blessings that He has already given us...and the blessings we have waiting ahead of us.
And I am reminded that this...this is all just temporary. Our situations, our possessions, even our health.
There is something SOOOO much better ahead of our days here on Earth. And that is where I am placing my hope and joy.
The house will get finished...or not.
My health may improve...or not.
But of this I am certain....the blessings we have had given to us should not be discounted by our grumblings.
He has plans for us that are SO much better than any plans we could have for ourselves.
His mercies are new each morning.
And I am going to make every effort to show gratefulness and joy in every situation.
Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits
may your day be JOYfilled! ♥~